For the Love of a Pet...It's ALL the difference in the World to me.

This post is going to be a little different than the norm.  And for those of you who are able to live without a furry companion...you just won't get it.  And that's ok. 

My DH and I were married in our 20's and were just not ready for kids at that time.  As a kid, growing up in a household with a dog and a cat, I was used to having them around.  So, after we were married, our tiny little apartment seemed very empty...something was missing.  So, one spontaneous evening in November of 1996, we headed to the pet store to pick up bird food.  Bird Food?  Yes, we had a Sun Conure named Sadie...but she was just not the pet I was used to.  She didn't snuggle and she would scream and scream...I needed something more.

So, where was I?  Oh right, the pet store....long story short, we went to the pet store for bird food and came home with a puppy.  I know, I know...I'm a bad person...buying a puppy from a pet store.  But we were young, ignorant and I just couldn't resist those cute, little, brown eyes staring back at me.  Let me just say, I would never buy from a pet store again after learning the darkness of the puppy mills...but again, I was young and ignorant.

And there we were...the 3 of us driving home from the store, in my 1993 Ford Probe.  We called her Shelby and she was an American Eskimo, formerly known as a Spitz.  I guess the name "Spitz" had a bad rap and they re-marketed the breed as American Eskimo.  It didn't matter to us, she was our first little baby and she was mine.

As the years progressed, Shelby followed me everywhere, including the bathroom.  When I was in the shower she would lay right outside of the tub area.  When she would hear the water shutting off, that was her queue to leave the bathroom.  She was my laundry buddy too.  Every laundry load I would do, she would be there, sitting right outside the laundry room door. 

When we brought home our first little bundle of joy from the hospital, Shelby was there.  She was very interested to see what was making "all that noise".  Every night feeding, and for my first baby this was every 2 hours, Shelby was there.  We would sit together as I fed the baby.  When someone was sick and we were up in the middle of the night, Shelby was there too.  We referred to her as "Shelby Nightingale".

That leads me up to her name...every time we saw a funny show, commercial or just heard an unusual name, we added it to Shelby's name.  A lifetime of moments she became...Shelby, Cha-cha, Esposito, Luka-Bella, Charlamagne, Chiquita, Baby Spice, Rubatella, Whiskers the Wooby, Woo.   Yes, this little dog was a BIG part of our lives.

So, after 15-1/2 years of living, we had a tough decision to make this past Friday, February 3.  She had not been doing well, lots of shaking and panting and blood work revealed there was an issue with her liver.  We knew that we couldn't let our first baby suffer any longer, so we gave the 'ok' to the Vet to Euthanize her.  Gosh, what a moment that was...I can't even describe the feeling of hurt I felt as they injected her with the medication to stop her heart.  It still hurts.

But life goes on and now as it has been 48 hours since, I have to start focusing on the family again.  To some, they will never understand the hurt I feel of losing her.  But to others, they know exactly what I am going through.  But through the good and through the bad, Shelby was there.  And now life is so strange without her.  As I type this, my husband rolls his eyes and says "What are you doing?" with a very cynical tone.  This is therapy, this helps me...writing is what I like to do.  So, I am doing it.

For those without a dog in their lives, I feel sorry for you.  You will never know the true, unconditional love a pet can provide.  Pets won't judge you and they are ALWAYS happy to see you.  That feeling you get just scratching behind their ears or under their chin...one that is priceless when you are having a rough day.

Thank you Shelby for all that you were to me...I will miss u!  <3

And a special "Thank You" goes out to Hamilton Animal Care for all they have done for us.  If you need a caring and "No task is too small" type of Vet, I HIGHLY recommend them!